Having Helen Clark work in New York is one thing – having her run the world from there is another

Bugger. Alf has been scooped by his mate Whaleoil.

Not that he is complaining. Whaleoil has done a splendid job of spreading the awful news about the PM’s latest bit of howz-your-father in the foreign affairs domain.

Trouble is, Alf has been so busy trying to muster support among his party mates to stop this outrage that he hasn’t got around to alerting his constituents.

Not until now.

The full horror of what lies in store becomes all too clear from the post at Gotcha, which says:

The Her­ald reports (print only, Busi­ness Her­ald page 27) that trai­tor Key has ordered MFAT to begin prepa­ra­tions for a diplo­matic cam­paign to back Helen Clark for UN Sec­re­tary Gen­eral. The paper says the trai­tor Key is fac­ing oppo­si­tion from his cab­i­net col­leagues but is deter­mined to get Clark into the world’s top diplo­matic job.

Wha­le­oil couldn’t believe this was true, so he checked with his mate Alf Grum­ble who has close links with the gov­ern­ment, MFAT and the Welling­ton lob­by­ing com­mu­nity – but Alf says it’s not only true but more advanced than the Her­ald knows.

So it has come to this – not only is the trai­tor Key con­tent with keep­ing in place all Clark’s pet pro­grammes (Work­ing for Fam­i­lies, KiwiSaver, the Cullen Fund, interest-free stu­dent loans, the Employ­ment Rela­tions Act) he is now going to grant her her heart’s desire and try to make her head of the UN.

Does any­one in the Cab­i­net have the balls to stop him?

It is the duty of every loyal Kiwi to see this stopped.

This, of course, is pretty much what Alf has been saying to anyone who will listen.

Alas, Alf does not sit at the Cabinet table, a catastrophic consequence of the PM’s inexplicable failure to recognise his remarkable political and administrative skills and his enormous appetite for hard work.

Hence he is in no position to be the someone with balls – and the moral strength to put his career on the line – to try to stop this outrage.

Unlike Chris Carter, he has not resorted to sending anonymous letters to the news media to alert the public in a desperate bid to try to put things right.