An eel up there could have wrecked him, as it did when a Chinese prank went fatally wrong

Gotta express profound bewilderment tonight at the bizarre things that happen to some blokes.

Mind you, maybe we wouldn’t know if medical staff didn’t spread the word by behaving in a very unethical way and leaking clinical information that strictly speaking should remain confidential.

For example, if it weren’t for unethical staff who accessed a patient’s sensitive medical images, we might never have learned about the Kiwi bloke who had an eel removed from his rectum.

The Herald reported the case (here) in September last year.

A man sought emergency treatment at hospital in Auckland this week with an eel stuck up his bottom.

The unnamed individual presented himself at the A&E department at Auckland City Hospital to explain his embarrassing problem.

It is believed the patient was sent for X-rays and a scan, which showed there was an eel lodged inside him.

“The eel was about the size of a decent sprig of asparagus and the incident is the talk of the place,” a hospital source said.

“Doctors and nurses have come across people with strange objects that have got stuck where they shouldn’t be before, but an eel has to be a first.”

Ah. The Herald was relying on “a hospital source”.

But it was unclear how the eel managed to be trapped inside the man.

The Herald said it believed medics successfully removed the creature and the man was later discharged.

The official information was sparse (and properly so).

A hospital spokesman last night confirmed the bizarre incident had taken place.

“In response to a direct query from the Herald on Sunday, we can confirm that an adult male presented at Auckland City Hospital this week with an eel inside him,” Matt Rogers, spokesman for Auckland District Health Board, said.

He added: “No further comment will be made out of respect for the patient’s right to privacy.”

Now the incident has come back to bite a few medics on the bum.

Radio NZ is reporting (here) –

The Auckland District Health Board has disciplined more than 30 staff members who accessed a patient’s sensitive medical images.

A six-month investigation has found that 33 doctors, nurses and other staff breached the man’s privacy after he turned up at Auckland City Hospital’s emergency department in September last year with an eel trapped in his rectum.

DHB chief executive Ailsa Claire said in some cases, staff shared the records with others and may have leaked them to the media.

Ms Claire said the results of the investigation, which the board had shared with the patient, were disappointing. Staff should not be accessing medical records for purely vicarious reasons.

As a result of the investigation, the DHB will ensure its staff are made well aware of its policy, including signing a confidentiality agreement annually, rather than just when staff start their job.

So was anyone fired?

Ms Claire could not say what disciplinary action had been taken against each staff member, but it could range from a verbal warning to dismissal.

The bloke whose bottom accommodated the eel for a while won’t necessarily be mollified by what the DHB has done.

But he might take some comfort that his case is not unique.

Just recently, it transpires, a Chinese man was inspired by a porn clip to insert as two-feet-long eel (see here) up his rectum.

Not quite two feet, as you will see when the measurement is given in inches. But plenty of eel, nevertheless.

Alas, the creature started nibbling on his intestines which caused internal bleeding.

According to foreign website The Smoking Section, the 39-year-old man rushed to the casualty unit of a south China hospital, begging doctors to remove the eel trapped inside him.

“Please, please help me. The eel is moving through my body,” pleaded the unidentified man. Surgeons found the 20 inch long Asian swamp eel clinging to the intestinal wall of the man, who suffered massive internal bleeding from the snakelike fish puncturing his colon.

“This was a particularly idiotic stunt and could have caused him a serious injury. Eels have small but very sharp teeth,” said the hospital spokesperson.

According to the doctors, the eel was removed after a two-hour-long operation.

It was live after being removed from the body of the man but died soon after.

It weighed 3 pounds and was 22 inches long.

The man is rehabilitating after the hospitals.

However, his troubles are far from over as Chinese police is preparing to book him under cruelty-to-animals law.

Dunno what it is about Chinese and eels, but Alf recalls a bloke in China dying after having an eel inserted into his rectum.

He tracked down a report (here) of what happened.

Doctors who treated the victim in the Sichuan Province, did not know how the man met his demise until they performed an autopsy and discovered an Asian swamp eel up his backside.

Reports indicate that the man, who has only been identified as a chef, apparently was a victim of a horrible prank. The chef, after a heavy night of drinking, passed out with some of his friends. Those friends thought that it would be funny to put the eel inside of the victim.

In this case it was 50cm long, which is around 20 inches.

It must have been hungry. The medical examiner determined the cause of death was that the eel devoured the bloke’s bowels.

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