GE Free Luddites give us a laugh (but not intentionally) by advising Fonterra not to kill babies

If grandma must suck eggs, she will be hard-pressed to find inorganic ones.

If grandma must suck eggs, where must she go to find inorganic ones?

What a glorious example of teaching your grandma to suck eggs.

They will be free-range, no doubt, and “organic” for good measure.

GE Free New Zealand, a bunch of latter-day Luddite agitators, has told Fonterra it must ensure food safety with its infant formula exports into China.

It must do what?

Ensure its infant formula doesn’t kill the customers?

Are they for real?

This is like telling airline pilots they must try to get their passengers to their destination without crashing.

Or like telling surgeons they should try to keep their patients alive.

Or like telling butchers to try not to cut their fingers off.

It amounts either to a risible absurdity or to a gross impertinence.

Because they have no sense of humour – none that Alf can discern, anyway – he is finding them guilty of a gross impertinence.

The advice has been given by these GE Free tossers (according to a Radio NZ report) after Fonterra announced its intention to invest $615 million in a partnership with a Chinese firm Beingmate.

Part of the deal is an agreement to market Fonterra’s Anmum brand formula, produced in New Zealand, through Beingmate’s extensive distribution network in China.

GE Free New Zealand president Claire Bleakley has been impelled to stick her silly neck out and advise the biggest company in the land that safety is paramount following last year’s botulism scare.

“We do believe that Fonterra’s supply chain was compromised highly by the botulism scare. It must ensure that its food chain is safe and that any consumer can be guaranteed of a high quality, GE-free, uncontaminated, pesticide-free product”.

First, let’s not forget there was no botulism. There was nothing more than something the press called a scare.

Second, there has been significant overhauling of food safety and export certification requirements as a consequence.

Does Ms Bleakley seriously think the splendid people who manage Fonterra are oblivious to the need to meet high standards in their biggest market (and all other markets come to think of it)?

Alf is inclined to think that if her impulse to give this advice is a product of her assiduously steering clear of GE tucker, it’s a great advertisement for switching to the GE stuff to find a superior form of brain food.

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