Radio NZ hacks go looking for Maori names on births list and – oh dear – see what they found!

Sorry, we can't call him Alf...the regulations require he be given a Maori name...

Sorry, we can’t call him Alf…the regulations demand he be called Hone..

Dunno if we are supposed to feel guilty.

But the precious prats at Radio NZ, who relish showing off their Te Reo to an audience comprising many listeners with no inkling of what they are saying, now seems to be rebuking Kiwis for not thinking about indigenous options when they name their kids.

A news item today is headed “Parents overlook Maori names”.

More likely, parents didn’t overlook these names but preferred non-Maori names.

The news item kicks off with a chiding tone:

Maori names are noticeably absent from the top 100 baby names for 2014 with Anglo-Saxon and biblical names proving most popular.


These names would be “noticeably absent” only among people who went out of their way to look for them in a list released yesterday by Births, Deaths, and Marriages.

Alf hasn’t bothered checking out the names on this list because, frankly, he doesn’t give a toss.

But the Radio NZ item says they had names such as Oliver, Jack, Charlotte, and Olivia, taking out the top spots.

Then the journalist returns to the race issue:

Over the past 10 years boys names such as Ashton, Sione, and Cooper have dipped in and out of the list but Maori boys names had yet to appear.

Girls faired slightly better with the name Manaia appearing four years ago at number 79 and Anahera reaching number 86 in 2009.

But none of these made the cut last year, whereas names such as Trinity, Freya and Nevaeh (which is heaven backwards) did.

The fascinating thing about this trivia is that there is much greater fecundity among indigenous persons than among non-Maori.

Even so, the parents aren’t as obsessed as the journalist seems to be with giving their offspring Maori names:

About 20 percent of Maori women aged 15 and over had given birth to four or more children compared to only 12.2 percent of the European women, meaning there was even more reason for Maori names to be chosen.

But this was not the case.

Fifteen percent of the population (598,602) identified as Maori in the 2013 Census.

The plonker responsible for this pap obviously wants us to figure that 15 per cent of the new kids should have been given Maori names and that indigenous persons accordingly have yet another reason for feeling aggrieved.

But hey – aren’t we forgetting that Kiwis perhaps prefer non-Maori names?

This would not surprise Alf. He is struck by the fact that a whole heap of locations are given Maori names not because people want them but because they are forced upon them under the terms of Treaty settlements or because of diktats flowing from the Geographic Board.

He suspects that some bunch of PC-infected tossers – in the Green Party, Maori Party of some such – will be drawing attention to the aforementioned Radio NZ news item and demand remedial action (even though nothing needs fixing).

Next thing you know, a commission will be set up to ensure that an appropriate quota of Maori names for the new-born is set and met.

Watch this space next year…



4 Responses to Radio NZ hacks go looking for Maori names on births list and – oh dear – see what they found!

  1. Barry says:

    Hello Alf. I too heard that racist garbage on RNZ National this morning.

    My immediate thought was that people know that if they give their son or daughter a so-called “maori” name the kid is going to forever find it hard to get a real job with such a handicap hanging round his or her neck!

    I think that RNZ National is so rapidly becoming a cesspit of phoney so-called “maori” politically correct rubbish that it’s nearing the time when it should stop being funded by taxpayers.

    • Alf Grumble says:

      Alf begs to differ. Nowadays a Maori name should open the pathway to a raft of arrangements and an array of publicly funded troughs set up in the name of positive discrimination and The Treaty. It also will give them a good chance of getting a seat on the New Plymouth council when its mayor has introduced the 50:50 co-governance arrangement he regards as fair and proper.

  2. Barry says:

    Alf, I said a REAL job!

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