Sure, Larry has billions of dollars, but obviously not enough to help his Warkworth company’s R&D

April 24, 2015
Driven by a fair wind and a nice Kiwi subsidy...

Driven by a fair wind and a nice Kiwi subsidy…

Alf’s mates in the Eketahuna Club are pretty keen for him to have a chat with Steven Joyce about some of the R&D funding handouts he loves to toss to people who seriously look like they don’t much need it.

They are livid that some of this boodle has been tossed to Oracle’s boatbuilder – potentially worth up to $17.25 million, according to media reports.

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The Flavell formula for prospering in international markets – less song and dance and more hard sell

November 20, 2014
Mind you, we can't get too much cargo into the holds of these vessel.

Mind you, we can’t get too much cargo into the holds of the Maori fleet.

Dunno quite what to make of something Te Ururoa Flavell has been bleating about.

According to a newspaper report Alf read today, he was banging on about some outfit called Maori Inc.

Moreover, he was offering the leaders of this organisation some commercial advice.

But what is the extent of his commercial experience?

That would depend on what he did before becoming an MP, one imagines.

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Sorry to say, it’s John Key who is dishing out the corporate swill – and he’s calling for more troughers

November 7, 2014

 It sounded highly laudable, when The Boss announced it.bloated-pig-approaching-trough

The Government is co-investing in two new projects as part of the Tourism Growth Partnership.

The press statement from his office explains that the Tourism Growth Partnership is a $32 million contestable Government fund which aims to support innovation and productivity in the tourism sector.

Let’s call it a trough.

For each project approved for investment, the Government provides up to 50 per cent of the required funding.

And [drum roll please] the latest winners are….

Sorry, that’s not the official way of announcing it.

No, The Boss would prefer we say the successful applicants in the second round of funding are Christchurch International Airport’s Welcome China Project, which will receive $270,000 in funding, and Southern World Vacation’s Limited which will receive $112,950.

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You must break an egg to make an omlette – and you must sell a bit of Tainui land to build an inland port

October 8, 2014
This will look splendid when it has been concreted - now I've got to persuade the tribe.

This will look splendid when it has been concreted – now I’ve got to persuade the tribe.

Uh, oh. A grand development plan in the Waikato seems to have been fouled by a few differences among shareholders.

Alf speaks of Tainui Group Holdings’ plans for a multi-billion-dollar Ruakura development.

TGH has been itching for more than five years to get cracking and turn more than 600 hectares of good cow-nourishing pasture into a transport and residential hub.

It was named a project of national significance by the Environmental Protection Authority last year.

This was a clever move by the developers. It allowed them to skip years of council hearings, objections and red tape.

Trouble is, it now has to mollify some members of the tribe.

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TGH boss should watch out for the knives as he pitches for a few more million dollars

October 4, 2014
The board is backing him...so who wants him out?

The board is backing him…so who wants him out?

Waikato-Tainui, the indigenous persons who occupy the Waikato region, seem to have learned something from the Labour Party.

The something they seem to have learned is the art of challenging – if not overthrowing – the  leadership.

Alf learns this today from the local rag in that neck of the woods.

Attempts are being made to unseat the boss of Waikato’s economic powerhouse Tainui Group Holdings, in a document questioning his leadership appearing ahead of a crucial meeting this weekend.

But chief executive Mike Pohio’s supporters say it’s a smear campaign ahead of a big request for funds from the tribe to finance the company’s ambitious growth plans.

Nobody seems to be willing to put their hands up and identify themselves as being part of the overthrow plot.

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Bob won’t press on with his monorail project but iwi leaders can play the treaty card

May 30, 2014

Alf is wondering today what might have happened if Bob Robertson could wave the Treaty of Waitangi in support of his proposal to run a monorail through the Fiordland National Park.

As we all now know, the proposal has been scuttled by the government.

And Robertson has said he will not appeal against the decision or pursue any legal action.

He has taken it on the chin, after Conservation Minister Nick Smith turned down the application for the $240 million project, saying it didn’t stack up economically or environmentally.

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The Xtra fiasco: Yahoo! should be challenged to point to Eketahuna in contract discussions

February 23, 2013
Guess which one is the top Yahoo?

Guess which one is the top Yahoo?

Gotta express surprise that it has taken so long.

Telecom is reported (here) to be reviewing its email service with Yahoo! in the wake of the recent hacking scandal.

Telecom chief executive Simon Moutter is understood to have spoken to Yahoo’s global chief executive this week, expressing disappointment on behalf of his 450,000 customers.

The surprise should not be that his customers have been experienced big problems.

It’s that nobody at Telecom had the wit to wonder about the wisdom of signing on with a company called Yahoo!

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If Warner Bros want to take their ball and play somewhere else – well, just let ’em go

February 8, 2013
They look like Labour supporters.

They look like Labour supporters.

It is probably economic treason to say so, and Mrs Grumble delivered a caution to that effect.

But Alf is bound to say he couldn’t give a toss for The Hobbit and won’t be going to see it. Among other considerations, he is of an age where a visit to the gents will be required some time between the movie’s start and its finish, and this means he will (1) miss some of the action and (2) disrupt the viewing of others when he pushes desperately past them to make that visit.

Oh, and he does not give a toss about what Warner Bros might think about this country as a location for making movies.

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It’s simple, Simon – if we winnow the fuckwits, we reduce the support for Labour and the Greens

January 23, 2013

That Bridges bugger has wasted no time in trying to show the energy and enthusiasm sought by The Boss with his cabinet shake-up.

It’s misguided, of course, as you would expect from a bloke who spawned a son and called him Emlyn and who lists his interests as running, reading and being with his family.

As Minister of Consumer Affairs, Bridges has just announced (here) a ban – would you believe it? – on the sale of magnets.

Or rather, the sale of high-powered magnet sets, to be more specific.

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Here’s one good reason for joining the EU – it would frustrate Labour and its wowser supporters

November 30, 2012

Can’t think of 10 good reasons for joining the European Union.

Or three good reasons, let’s face it.

But there’s one damned good reason, as you will learn from a Daily Mail report here.

Membership of the EU would stymie the efforts of wowsers and tossers – including Labour Party MPs – who support the introduction of a minimum alcohol price.

This especially includes Labour’s associate justice spokesperson, Lianne Dalziel who campaigned for a minimum price to be included in the Alcohol Law Reform Bill.

An astonishing number of Kiwis (see here) seem willing to forego the opportunity to buy bargain-price wine at their supermarket.

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