Labour did a U-turn on a capital gains tax so it could take pot-shots when we Nats changed direction

May 17, 2015

Alf has confessed to his drinking mates that maybe he wasn’t paying attention, when capital gains taxes were last discussed by our caucus.

He has a strong recollection of scoffing at Labour’s capital tax proposals during the election campaign last year and he was hugely amused when the lefties decided this policy had been a mistake.

He also recalls the strongly expressed rejection of a capital gains tax from Bill English (our splendid Minister of Finanace, if you aren’t acquainted with his importance to our economic well-being).

Not too long ago he was disputing an OECD report which said the growing gap between rich and poor in New Zealand is leading to lower overall economic growth.

A report from the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development said the countries with the biggest increases in income gaps over recent years are New Zealand, Finland, Israel, Sweden and the United States.

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The Brits have figured out how to expand their economy – with drugs and sex – but France says non

December 27, 2014
An easy way to give GDP a leg-up...

An easy way to give GDP a leg-up…

Alf is keen to get back to Parliament where he will explain to Craig Foss his fiendish plan for lifting the country’s GDP.

Foss is our Minister of Statistics and the fiendish plan involves expanding the GDP data set.

It can be done by following the Brits, as we learn from this report in The Telegraph.

Britain has overtaken France to become the world’s fifth largest economy, new analysis shows.

A shake-up of the national accounts this summer, which showed the UK’s downturn during the Great Recession was shorter and shallower than previously thought, helped Britain overtake the Gallic economy by a whisker this year.

The Centre for Economics and Business Research (CEBR) said Britain’s acceleration was also boosted by the inclusion of sex and drugs to UK growth.

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Seymour should ask how many more votes ACT might get if it wasn’t so precious about corporate handouts

December 11, 2014
Then you fill it up with dollars and it's first in, first served...

Then you fill it up with dollars and it’s first in, first served…

Alf admires the aplomb with which his good mate Steven Joyce brushes off any suggestion a Tory Government should not be dishing out a rich swill for corporate oinkers.

If business benefactors find we Tories won’t reward them with a bit of corporate welfare now and again, the bloody economy would grind to a halt because we can be damned sure a pinko government won’t be helping them.

ACT’s David Seymour, who is new to this sort of thing, has a lot to learn because he was putting Parliamentary questions to Joyce yesterday on this subject. Obviously he disapproves of our generosity to Big Business.

He wanted to know if Steven was concerned at the scale of corporate welfare in New Zealand under this Government and if not, why not?

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FIRST Union wants supermarkets to pay the same wage but doesn’t mention competitive pricing

November 16, 2014

Alf seems to be missing something about that wonderful element in our economy called free enterprises.

This is the idea that one business can compete with another by offering better quality, or lower prices, and so on.

It requires business people to strive for efficiencies to trim their costs.

Labour costs are part of this.

But the FIRST Union apparently would prefer all supermarkets to pay much the same wages.

Presumably it expects them to charge the same prices, too.

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We mustn’t shun all wankers – not the ones who could pull together for the export push

June 29, 2014
 Only one in 20 applicants will pass the screening process.

Only one in 20 applicants will pass the screening process.

Alf will be having a chat with Steven Joyce – our splendid Minister of Economic Development – with a very innovative idea he conceived while reading The Telegraph.

He will be proposing New Zealand encourages developing an industry of professional wankers.

Steven is likely to point out that New Zealand already has professional wankers, and there are far too many of the buggers, mainly to be found infesting the Labour and Green Parties, the NZ Party, the Internet Mana Party, some newspapers…

He then is likely to demand:

“So what the fuck are you on about, Alf?”

Or words to that effect.

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What’s needed for the economy to fire up? A good dousing with water wouldn’t go amiss

March 16, 2013

That got it going ... plenty of water.

That got it going … plenty of water.


The boss delivered another damned good speech in Auckland yesterday.

He said (see here) the New Zealand economy is emerging from tough economic times.

Alf’s has a vague memory of him saying something similar a few years ago.

But that was then and now is now.

And he is not being unduly optimistic about the outlook.

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A “please explain” is sent to the Teachers Council over its blanket protection of the wayward

February 17, 2013

We hesitate, on this blog, to give any credit to lefites (or greenies, bankers and tossers, among others).

But it looks like a Parliamentary select committee chaired by a leftie is on the right track, given a good steer – no doubt – by the Nats among its members.

The committee is the Regulations Review Committee and according to the Herald on Sunday (here) it is seeking explanations from the New Zealand Teachers Council.

It wants to know – as most of us do – how come it has thrown a blanket suppression order over all complaints against teachers.

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The French have missed out on Dover – so why not whet their interest in Auckland?

December 24, 2012
But wouldn't we rue its sale?

But wouldn’t we rue its sale?

The Brits don’t have the bottle for it, obviously.

But we Kiwis do.

Accordingly we should do what the Cameron Government shied away from doing, which was sell the port of Dover.

We couldn’t sell the port of Dover, let’s be clear.

But we can take a cue from the British, insofar as the idea was to get a nice return from selling the port made famous by Dame Vera Lynn.

And we have lots of ports. Read the rest of this entry »


The Hobbit and handouts – would they really have gone to Scotland if we didn’t fill the trough?

November 27, 2012

Alf had agreed with The Boss about providing troughs for the snouts of movie moguls.

If we’ve got to pick winners, and then nourish the buggers with public funding, then let’s pick winners from a glamourous industry like movie-making.

The photo opportunities for The Boss and his team are apt to have much more appeal to voters when they are pictured with movie people than – for example – coal miners.

At least, that’s what Alf thought until he found the Grumbles weren’t on the invitation list for the premiere of The Hobbit.

He is now taking a more jaundiced view of things, and especially he is wondering why the Government doesn’t want to disclose information about their handouts and other help to The Hobbit makers.

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If you pay peanuts you might get monkeys – but what if one monkey is better paid than another?

October 14, 2012

Alf has never been happy knowing that many MPs do much less work than he does for the same weekly pay and expenses.

This has him supporting the idea we should be paid for what we do, and if we do more than some other MPs, then we should be rewarded accordingly.

With the right incentive, he would arrange to meet many more constituents and discuss their problems down at the Eketahuna Club.

In line with this, he supports good teachers being paid more than bad teachers.

This doesn’t necessarily mean he believes in equal pay for equal work, because a quality thing comes into considerations.

It’s more a matter of his thinking he deserves more pay than others.

But he is having second thoughts about the principle of equal pay for equal work after having his attention drawn to the video above.

The video is presented by the legendary primatologist, Frans de Waal.

It shows what happens when two capuchin monkeys are given unequal pay for equal work.

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