Andrew’s political career is over, they say, but he ran out of luck when he fell to No 13 on the list

August 26, 2014
End of the line for Andy?

So Andy is in for the chop?

Alf has been delighting today in the NZ Herald’s recollections of the ups and downs of a certain Andrew Williams.

The latest news is that New Zealand First looks likely to dump him because he antagonised its hierarchy by publicly complaining about his demotion in the party’s draft list.

It was news to Alf, of course, that the party has a hierarchy.

He thought it had one chief, Winston Peters, and a few Indians. But not much, organisationally, in between.

It was not news that Williams’ political career is in trouble. He had stuck his neck out and…

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If piddling on the news media was an Olympic event, Winston Peters would take the gold

August 3, 2011

But if you can piss on a journalist, go for it...

It hasn’t taken Win too long to show he is back in form for the 2011 general election.

His game is to tell news media bugger all, besides what he wants to tell them, in which department he can be remarkably voluble. But for the rest of it, just treat them with contempt and their questions as preposterous. He’s a class player.

He quickly put a few points on the board yesterday after announcing Andrew Williams as the candidate to run for New Zealand First in North Shore.

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Let’s build a statue – a wee one like this would do the trick – in honour of the North Shore’s Mayor

April 11, 2010

Enough, these assaults on Andrew Williams, beleaguered Mayor of the North Shore.

Alf has enormous sympathy for the poor bugger, who is accused by Whale Oil today of “now suf­fer­ing from delu­sions as well as fre­quent vis­its from the piss fairy.”

He has writ­ten to the Domin­ion Post about their edi­to­r­ial about him.

He is now accus­ing one of the most pop­u­lar dailies and the Fair­fax Group for stalk­ing him for months.

Alf would much rather the Mayor of North Shore be honoured for his work for his city, rather than vilified.

A statue would be appropriate.

It could be modelled on the statue pictured below, the Manneken Pis (Dutch for little man urinating) in Brussels.

It is a small bronze fountain sculpture depicting a naked little boy urinating into the fountain’s basin. It was designed by Jerome Duquesnoy and put in place in 1618 or 1619.

According to Wikipedia, there are several legends behind the statue. The most famous is the one about Duke Godfrey III of Leuven.

In 1142, the troops of this two-year-old lord were battling against the troops of the Berthouts, the lords of Grimbergen, in Ransbeke (now Neder-over-Heembeek). The troops put the infant lord in a basket and hung the basket in a tree to encourage them. From there, the boy urinated on the troops of the Berthouts, who eventually lost the battle.

Alf is confident he can come up with a similar legend for the North Shore statue.

Something to do with the Wee Hero who Pissed Off a Whale.

Just prop me up near a tree outside the town hall.


A tipple or two should not be a resignation matter – but does the mayor have a pee problem?

March 29, 2010

Alf has no problem demanding the resignation of North Shore mayor Andrew Williams for being a clown. Or any other mayor who becomes a clown.

Demanding his resignation because he enjoys a bit of wine is a different matter. If Alf were to climb on to that bandwagon, he would be in grave danger of having his disparagers in Eketahuna (there are two or three) demand he do likewise.

Alf, of course, regards the capacity to sink a scuttle of suds as the mark of a red-blooded Kiwi bloke. Most critically, however, a red-blooded Kiwi bloke should never run amok, or become violent, abusive or otherwise anti-social as a consequence of imbibing.

Mayor Williams, maybe, fails that test.
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Ah, so we can have a slash at Waihopai, but farting noises near the Mayor of North Shore are a no-no

March 18, 2010

Alf has awoken the morning after celebrating St Patrick’s Day in appropriate style to find the world of civil rights turned upside down.

Under modern rules of protest, we can damage an American communications installation in the South Island on the grounds we firmly believe it is a spy station responsible for contributing to the deaths of innocent people around the world.

But we can’t blow a raspberry at the Mayor of North Shore in a shopping centre.

Not even if we are female, in our 70s, and should have earned the right – by virtue of greater maturity – to blow raspberries at a Mayor regarded by some as mad.

The Herald reports both stories today –
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Rodney gives us new insights into mayoral madness and ministerial time-keeping

December 11, 2009

North Shore Mayor Andrew Williams has done us a favour by asking for, and then publishing, more details about ACT leader Rodney Hide’s overseas travels with that squash-playing sheila.

Williams is reported to have used the Official Information Act to winkle out the itinerary and Hide’s report to the Cabinet. He sent the stuff out with a press release yesterday.

“Aucklanders will be fascinated to learn that, according to the official trip diary, Rodney Hide spent around 10 hours on Auckland governance, three and a half hours on regulatory reform, four and a half hours on Act Party policy, one hour in media interviews, and seven and a half hours having breakfast and lunch with his tour party who accompanied him on the trip,” Mr Williams said.

Let’s be pricks and add that up.

Oh, yes. A grand tally of 19 hours work.

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Rankin’s record of missed meetings

May 31, 2009

The media jackals have found fresh Rankin bones to gnaw into.

They have shifted from Christine’s bed chamber ( tittle-tattle stuff on marriage, divorce, suicide and what have-you) and into the council chamber.

The Herald on Sunday has gone there and pounced on Rankin’s attendance record at Auckland Regional Council meetings.

It’s the worst among elected members of Greater Auckland’s major councils.
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An ill-considered expression of gratitude

March 17, 2009

Alf extends his thanks to Whale Oil for alerting him to some provocative stuff (at least it will be here in Eketahuna) from North Shore mayor Andrew Williams.

Whale Oil finds the Mayor a rich source of fodder for his blog, and thus keeps an eye on mayoral statements, such as that reported by TVNZ.
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