One of Alf’s mates, who has been reading some analysis by NZ Herald political hack John Armstrong, was unduly concerned about his political pal’s future.
He has been assured that Alf is safe and secure in his National stronghold.
The concern was raised by Armstrong’s observation that Winston Peters had cut a swathe through the wealthier parts of the Northland electorate in Saturday’s byelection.
This secured him the most votes in the National bastion of Kerikeri and matched the number cast for the ruling party in Wellsford.
It said the Littlefield Police Department had acquired a 200 kiloton nuclear warhead under a US Department of Defense programme that distributed surplus weapons to local agencies throughout the USA.
The device, which is ten times more powerful than the bomb detonated over Hiroshima in World War II, will be used to deter crime in Littlefield and the greater Jasper County area, Police Chief Jefferson Bailey said.
“There will be no more crime in Littlefield,” Bailey said, “Because if there is, I’ll blow this town sky-high.”
Many of Littlefield’s 15,000 residents, according to the report, had expressed concern over its police department’s acquisition of the nuclear weapon and the guidelines governing its potential use.
Mrs Grumble phoned during the boring bit of Parliamentary proceedings today to recommend giving a Sergeant Schultz award to Police Minister Michael Woodhouse.
Woodhouse won plaudits from her for his skill at saying nothing about his role in the Mike Sabin matter.
Well, almost nothing.
He refused – again – to confirm whether he was briefed by Police about Sabin.
‘But he said he was “absolutely” confident he had handled the situation properly.
If he handled the matter properly without being briefed by the Police, of course, he is entitled to another award, this one for prowess in the Police portfolio while being kept in the dark.
Mr Peters, speaking at Ratana Pa, says his party would never support “separatist” Maori Party policies such as having separate Maori units in prison, the separate Maori social welfare system Whanau Ora and the Tino Rangatiratanga Flag.
Mr Peters says he could not work with the Maori Party as long as it keeps “separatist” policies.
“You can’t have a Crown that’s composed of two different groups – the rest and Maori. Either we’re all together or we’re all going to be separate,” he says.
One mob is hollering for the drinking age to be raised. Another is hollering for the price of booze to be raised. Alf unabashedly supports the age lifters.
As he posted a few years ago, when musing on our liquor legislation, he was chuffed to find scientists have discovered a possible reason for hoonish behaviour – it’s that people don’t become true adults until they’re 24.
That suggests the drinking age should be raised to 24. Alf would not be fussed if it went higher.
It’s disappointing to say this about a colleague, but Police Minister Anne Tolley being much too blinkered about shadow police minister Jacinda Ardern.
What’s more, she seriously lacks imagination.
As a consequence of her somewhat plodding approach to denying her Labour opponent access to the country’s cop shops, Ardern has gained media coverage by bleating about being “banned” from visiting police stations.
If Tolley had allowed the visits to proceed, members of the public would have no cause to wonder if the Minister is being much too authoritarian and Ardern hard done by.
Gotta say Alf was becoming a bit hot and bothered about the cops, and the courts, after a special police unit’s botching of two high-profile investigations.
The unit in question was the Organised and Financial Crime Agency and as TV3 reported (here), it is the outfit that –
* Led the troubled inquiry into internet millionaire Kim Dotcom; and
* Ran an undercover gang operation that’s been slammed by a judge.
Mind you, we should be more than a bit bothered, too, that Police Minister Anne Tolley says she has no concerns about the botched investigations.
Really?
Even when a High Court justice found an undercover operation into a gang in Nelson abused court process, with a fake warrant and false charges?
On the positive side, there's no Mongrel Mob or Black Power here...
... but (on the negative side) it's too easy to find a shag.
Alf had been inclined to think somewhat unkindly about Kim Workman, director of an outfit called Rethinking Crime and Punishment.
Too often Workman seemed too be promoting namby-pamby ideas about dealing with the criminal classes.
But maybe Alf misjudged him, because Workman has released a media statement headed –
Proposal To Relocate Gang Members Away From Communities
Great. Alf has a similar proposal.
Maybe we could work together.
Mind you, when you read Workman’s statement you will find he is focused on relocating gang members away from gangs, when they are let out of jail (which happens much too soon for most of the buggers).
Posted by Alf Grumble 
Alf Grumble 