Dad stands by his footballing son – it’s no foul (when provoked) to hit the ref with an open hand

May 6, 2012

And if you don’t award the goal I’ll break your bloody jaw.

The Fasavalu family obviously lives under a different behavioural code than is applied in the Grumble family.

One of the buggers – a footballer named Tama – has been accused of breaking a referee’s jaw.

The HoS reports the matter here.

Tama Fasavalu was banned indefinitely from all football this week by Auckland Football and is facing an assault charge.

But the player’s aggrieved dad is saying it’s a bum rap and his boy has been wronged.

How come?

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Persistent Parker regurgitates his pap about Mexico despite being properly chided by Ambassador

April 24, 2012

But in this country you have to keep an eye on the rear end.

Dunno why the Mexicans bothered making a fuss over Labour MP David Parker’s warning that New Zealand risked turning into “Australia’s Mexico”.

The absurdity of the comparison was obvious to anyone with a reasonable share of brain cells.

For starters, Mexicans speak Spanish and use lots of maize in a diet that features tacos, enchiladas, mole sauce, atole, tamales, pozole and burritos. We Kiwis are fish and chips and meat-pie people, a diet complemented by steaks, oysters, mutton-birds, pork and puha and so on.

Mexicans fed on maize must be bursting to cross the border to get into some decent tucker, like Kentucky Fried and Big Macs.

Kiwis who go to Australia simply find the folks there are fish-and-chips and meat-pie people too, although they have turned the meat pie into something worthy of a banquet with a dish called the floater.

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Trespass orders be buggered – send in the Army to kick out the pesky Popata brothers

October 29, 2010

Welcome for coffee and a chat, folks - we recommend the flat white.

Chris Finlayson’s blather gives Alf a serious dose of the shits, on occasions.

Question Time in Parliament yesterday was yet another occasion.

Questioned in his role as Attorney-General about some Maori howz-your-father in the Far North, the bugger did his damndest to avoid denouncing the ratbags involved.

But denunciation was especially in order on this occasion, because two of the ratbags should have been in jail (for a considerable time) for roughing up our Prime Minister at Waitangi.

Alf would have jailed them for a few decades, then deported them to the land of their ancestors, which he believes is Hawaiki.

But the justice system let us down badly on that score, and now the Popata brothers are up to their tricks again.

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A balanced view of overseas investment

July 24, 2009

Them Labour buggers just don’t get it.

We Kiwis don’t save enough to provide the investment we need to lift our game, economically.

Moreover, because we don’t save enough, New Zealanders keep building up current account deficits.

There are not many options for funding these deficits. We can borrow from foreigners (further building up our hefty overseas debt) or we can sell assets.
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Why Bill won’t be feeding the Cullen Fund

May 6, 2009

The Government coffers took another blow in the nine months to March, when tax revenues (lower than forecast) and investment losses (higher than forecast) dragged the budget operating balance $7.7 billion into deficit, just a week or so ahead of Finance Minister Bill English presenting his 2009 budget.

No-one should be too surprised, as a consequence, if English decides to stop pumping money into the New Zealand Superannuation Fund (also known as the Cullen Fund, although Alf regards this as bad language and an expression to be avoided in polite company).

Those payments – in all likelihood – will be suspended because the dosh would come from borrowing and raising the public debt. Not smart.
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Why would Nick give up three jobs?

April 1, 2009

The numb-brains on the Labour side of the House persist with the canard that the ACC is being prepared for privatising.

Those claims have been revived by Nick Smith’s dumping several directors and replacing them with a new bunch (just as he said he would do).

The smart way to prepare the board for privatising – if that was the Nat agenda, which it isn’t – would be to stack it with Labourites and trade unionists, not clever business people.

Within months – maybe weeks – the public would be feeling the pinch from rising levies and a run-down service.

They would be so pissed off with the consequences they would demand a better deal.
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Betcha Nick Smith could play first violin, too

March 13, 2009

Dunno if we can spare Nick Smith from his mission – pursued with a zeal bounding on the fanatical – to shake up the ACC, rid its board of Labourites and…well, who knows what else?

But if we can spare him, he would be just the bloke to despatch to the US to save the Philadelphia Orchestra.
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Labour tries to create ACCrimony

March 10, 2009

We National MPs would be best to lie low for a while, after returning to our home towns at the end of the week.

There’s bound to be some upset among the poor people – and probably a bigger one among the wealthy buggers where we get much of our support – over the $32 increase in the motor vehicle levy from 1 July.

The motor vehicle licence fee for a petrol car will increase from $136.44 to $168.46 and the ACC petrol levy will rise from 9.34 cents per litre to 9.90 cents per litre.

To give him his due, ACC Minister Nick Smith looked remarkably unstressed after announcing it today.
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Looking on the bright side of job data

February 20, 2009

The country is still open for business.

But you wouldn’t think so, if you pay too much heed to the bleatings and brayings of the doomsayers.

To what effect, from a confidence perspective?

How many people are going to bother looking for jobs when the news media, economic commentators and too many politicians are banging on about rising unemployment as if the end of the world is nigh?

The publicity thus generated has a powerful negative effect on behaviour.
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Greens would gag on humble pie

February 18, 2009

Alf admits to dozing, during debate culminating in an overhelming Parliamentary vote (112-9) to repeal the Electoral Finance Act.

But he rejoices that the vote, with strong cross-party support, delivers on the Government’s election promise to repeal the EFA within its first 100 days.

The Greens demonstrated what a weird mob they are, however, by trying to resist the repeal. For the rest of us, it was good riddance, and that includes the Labour MPs and their supporters who put the pernicious legislation on the law books in the first place.

As Newstalk ZB reported Labour had been forced to eat humble pie during the first stages of the repeal process.

Labour’s electoral reform spokesman David Parker again acknowledged the previous government got it wrong and produced an overly complicated regime. However Labour, the Greens and the Progressives are strongly urging that replacement electoral law must favour transparency and keep big money out of the political process.

It would be too much to expect the Greens to eat humble pie. As Alf understands it, Sue Kedgley keeps the poor buggers on a strict diet of muesli, lettuce and bird seed.

That’s not brain tucker, in Alf’s book, which is why the Greens co-leader – wotzisname who replaced Rod Donald – was banging on about there being no need to repeal the legislation. What planet is he on, let alone what diet?

Oh, and wasn’t that him Alf heard on Morning Report, whining about the legislation being repealed just to keep an election promise?

Good grief. Alf thought it was when governments fail to keep their election promises that they should be given the hurry-up from their opponents.

But don’t get the idea some sort of vacuum has been created. The Electoral Amendment Act 2009 contains an interim measure that reinstates the relevant provisions of the Electoral Act 1993 – the law that preceded the EFA. These deal with electoral finance and retain the donations regime from the EFA.

A very general outline of the new deal can be found in a media release from Justice Minister Simon Power.