Ooh, that sounds like a great scheme, Mrs Grumble gurgled this morning on hearing that the Government is giving away money to help people grow their own vegetables.
Fair to say, Alf didn’t think it such a good idea unless Mrs Grumble was willing to do all the digging, the hoeing, the weeding and so on.
Let’s face it: you can get vegetables a helluva lot quicker by driving down to the supermarket than by growing them at home.
But Mrs Grumble was on a roll. Her argument: you don’t know where those supermarket vegetables have been grown or to what extent they have been drenched in bloody herbicides and pesticides? And that being so, then how are we to know when eating that stuff might be tantamount to suicide?