Does Rolf’s jail term mean fellow inmates must endure his accordion music for almost six years?

But fellow inmates might have cause to complain if he took it into jail with him.

Rolf Harris hasn’t done quite as well in a British court as a contender to the Maori throne did in a court in this country.

Nevertheless Rolf has been treated more generously than Alf expected. He will be banged up for just five years and nine months (a doddle, really, by the time good behaviour comes into considerations) and the cops have opted not to make the bugger stand trial for possessing a stash of child porn.

Mind you, the jail term was almost immediately referred to the UK’s Attorney General for being ‘unduly lenient’ after concerns were raised by a small number of members of the public.

Rolf was a grumpy bugger, back in the 1980s, when his kiddie fiddling flair was a dark secret

And I use this for sniffing out my prey.

The Waikato Times has caught up with Maxine Hodgson, who was involved in bringing Rolf Harris to Hamilton in the 1980s.

Harris, of course, is a performer with a special talent for playing a wobbleboard and – as he is more notoriously known nowadays – for his flair as a furtive kiddie fiddler.

Alf is inclined to think it might be better not to mention having anything to do with Harris.

Especially when the irony around one’s involvement with the disgraced Ozzie wobbleboarder is brought into considerations.

Breast-fondling case raises beguiling questions about how prominent figures are demoted

And was he ever considered “prominent”?

It’s very teasing of the court to continue to suppress the name of a bloke found guilty on three charges of indecently assaulting his stepdaughter.

He is described at Stuff today (here) simply as a former prominent figure.

Not a prominent figure, but a former prominent figure, it should be noted.

According to Stuff –

After a three-day retrial a jury of six men and women today found him guilty on three charges of indecent assault which date back to 30 December 2009.

They reached a unanimous guilty verdict on a charge relating to stroking the girl’s breast and majority verdicts on two other charges of indecently touching her and kissing her back.

The man, who has name suppression, shook his head in disbelief at the verdicts.

This is not the first time he had been found guilty.

Suppressed names short-change us in reports about a naughty step-father and a political smear campaign

Lest any of the good people of Eketahuna North suspect otherwise, even for a brief moment, let’s have this on the record.

Alf is not the bloke found guilty on charges of indecently assaulting his stepdaughter.

Nor is he Don Brash’s love child.

Mrs Grumble – fair to say – urged Alf not to make this declaration.

She said it was only attention-seeking. Moreover it was thoroughly unnecessary, because it would be obvious to constituents that he is not the mystery feller in either case, because –

* He is still married to her, his first wife, and they do not have step-children;

* He has never been a national figure (she unkindly said “and you never will be”); and

* He is bloody near as old as Don Brash.