On yer bike, greenies – the stats tell us why we need to spend much more on motorways

March 25, 2014
So long as the buggers keep to the left there is plenty of room for all os us...

So long as the buggers keep far to the left there is plenty of room for all of us…

Dunno what the Greens think they are trying to tell us.

But it looks like good news for the Government’s transport policies.

Today the muesli-munchers have banged out a statement to say cycling is booming throughout New Zealand despite the National Government’s failure to fund new cycle lanes to keep people safe.

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Don’t bother smiling in taxis: there’s a fair chance you won’t be caught by the security camera

July 8, 2013

It looks like the taxi industry is trying to take someone for a ride.

It is reported to be fearful that an increase in violent attacks on drivers will result from criminals becoming aware that as many as half the security cameras installed in cabs do not work properly.

Let’s have a replay of this concern.

The industry is fearful that criminals will wake up to the fact that as many as half the security cameras installed in cabs don’t work properly.

Accordingly there will be an increase in violent attacks on drivers.

Yep. The nature of the concern is all too apparent.

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Charging miscreant motorists for road closures might help to improve our driving habits

February 19, 2013

At first blush, Alf had some sympathy for the mother of a teenager who has been billed by the New Zealand Transport Agency for the cost of closing a road while she was cut free after a road accident.

But that’s because the first para of the report at Stuff (here) mentioned the daughter, Romy Goodfellow, having had a near-death experience, as a consequence of the mishap.

The report proceeded to make much of the young woman’s injuries.

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New speed cameras mightn’t trim road toll – but think about the revenue raising

January 9, 2012


Alf likes to think his superior motoring skills entitle him to break the country’s speed limits, but that everybody else on the roads should comply with the law.

Hence he is delighted to learn the authorities are considering introducing point-to-point (P2P) cameras, to deal to every other tosser on the roads.

These devices can calculate how fast a vehicle is travelling over a prolonged distance, whereas the existing speed cameras can detect a vehicle’s speed only at a certain spot.

They are already used in parts of Australia and across the United Kingdom and Europe.

As Alf understands it, the system works by using two cameras to record images of all vehicles as they enter and exit a pre-determined stretch of road.

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You only need pollsters when you’ve lost your grip

November 3, 2009

Must have a quiet word with Internal Affairs Minister Nathan Guy. The poor bugger should be getting out and about in his electorate much more – notwithstanding his ministerial workload – instead of paying bloody pollsters to find what people think of him.

Alf has no need for pollsters. He is in close touch with his constituents, and hence knows that the vast bulk of them regard him as hard-working and (for his age) good looking. That’s why electoral support for him is greater than Winston Peters’ ego.

Nathan, alas, doesn’t seem to know how he rates among his constituents.

And so he has organised a telephone poll to gauge Kapiti residents’ preferred expressway option – a highly contentious issue in that neck of the woods – as well as his own popularity.

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