Why “Waitangi” Day? The shit-stirring calls for a more appropriate name

February 3, 2012

Welcome to the marae, John...


Dunno why we bother calling it Waitangi Day.

It has become an occasion – in the Far North, anyway – for unseemly shit-stirring.

Accordingly we should think about calling it something more appropriate, like Maori Malevolence Day.

Hone Hawawira’s gaggle of malcontents is promising another dose of aggravation this weekend.

The Mana Party is warning Prime Minister John Key will get a hostile reception at Waitangi this weekend as anger among Maori grows over the potential removal of Treaty rights and cutbacks at the Maori Affairs Ministry, Te Puni Kokiri.

Mana spokesman Malcolm Mulholland said this morning Key was walking into “a perfect storm”.

Read the rest of this entry »


Advice to the Popatas: when you’ve done with protesting, limber up for the Olympics

March 22, 2011

You will be left behind if you can't maintain a brisk pace.

Alf has cause to take a fresh look at the Popata brothers, a stroppy twosome best known for roughing up the Prime Minister at Waitangi a year or so ago.

They are wasted in their occupations as a researcher and an interviewer.

Their forte – it transpires – is walking.

They are shaping up to be world-beaters.

Their strongest competition for an Olympic gold medal would come from those who have joined them on their hikoi from Cape Reinga to on Wellington.

Read the rest of this entry »


A snag with cultural differences is working out if you are being welcomed or victimised

February 7, 2011

"No, I haven't forgotten my manaakitanga - I'm not Maori and this is a stick-up."

It’s heartening to see one bit of Maoridom trying to compensate for some mischief and harm that’s been done by another bit.

According to the NZPA, Maori tourism operators have pitched in to help British tourists who lost cash and passports in a robbery in Whangarei. Good on them.

The thieves grabbed a bag containing “a large sum of cash” and passports at Whangarei Falls, just north of Whangarei on February 3.

Oops. Let’s stick the word “allegedly” into the previous sentence, because so far as is Alf is aware, whoever did what to whom has yet to be sorted out in the courts.

But here’s something we might muse on: the TVNZ report of the robbery said the visitors had been in the country only a week when they were robbed.

So how long should they have been here, to become eligible for an encounter with our indigenous robbers?

Read the rest of this entry »


Welcome Prince William – what a shame we don’t behead anti-royalist rabble nowadays

January 17, 2010

Unabashed royalists like Alf are chuffed that Prince William arrives in New Zealand today for a three-day visit.

He will be there, enthusiastically waving his Union Jack and wearing his tie with the Queen’s face emblazoned on it, when William touches down in Auckland just after 11am.

The prince’s first task will be to visit Eden Park to see redevelopment work and be briefed on plans for next year’s Rugby World Cup.

On Monday, he will attend a wreathlaying ceremony at the National War Memorial in Wellington.

But then – if it hasn’t happened already – the poor bugger will be exposed to the repugnant antics of some of our more odious citizens.

A bunch of protesters is intending to turn up when the prince opens the Supreme Court building in Wellington tomorrow.

Alf is ashamed to say some of our members of Parliament will be among the protesters.

He yearns for the good old days – a few centuries back – when your royals could have ordered the beheading of these rabble-rousing bastards.

In this case they are left-leaning trouble-makers, so their beheadings would lift the nation’s average IQ with two swings of an axe and do good things for the gene pool.

Read the rest of this entry »


Lessons in etiquette behind bars

March 18, 2009

Associate Corrections Minister Pita Sharples is pressing for the creation of Maori prisons “to help reduce the number of inmates who re-offend when released.”

This follows hard on the heels of the Government’s tabling of legislation paving the way for contracting out the management of prisons to the private sector.

Radio NZ reports:

Dr Sharples, who visited a Maori immersion unit at Rimutaka Prison on Tuesday, says re-offending by those who are involved in the units is lower than the rest of the prison population.
Read the rest of this entry »