Possums don’t ply themselves with booze to demonstrate how gravity works

May 3, 2012

Are possums higher up the order than me?

Boozing buffoons down south are giving a splendid demonstration of why the drinking age should be raised to 24 or higher because – until then – they are unfit to be regarded as adults.

They are also giving possums a bad name.

Alf’s attention has been drawn to their antics by the NZ Herald, which reports them here.

We learn of concerns being expressed by staff at Dunedin’s Botanic Garden about the growing popularity of a drinking game called “possum”.

Alf’s hackles rise whenever he hears of people playing drinking games, because he takes his drinking seriously.

The Good Lord did not give us booze to be used as a plaything. He gave us booze to foster conviviality and bonhomie, and (when Jesus turned water into wine) to wash down the fish at lunch.
Read the rest of this entry »

If a bloke can’t smoke a fag any more, will he be able to set light to a few faggots?

April 27, 2011

Yes, it's a fag - and he has the butt end near his mouth.

Back in 1988, Mark Todd featured in Sports Illustrated after winning his gold medal on Charisma at the Seoul Olympics.

At that time it was the horse’s age – not Todd’s – that drew comment.

Charisma was as old as any horse at Seoul, and surely the smallest. At the team awards ceremony, he really did look like a pony standing beside 11 real horses, and the scene was all the more bizarre when the riders dismounted and the tiny horse’s man stood head and shoulders above the other 11 riders.

But the star of the item was Todd, then aged 32, who was raised on a farm and had been riding since he was seven.

He has wavy brown hair that shines copper in the sun when he doffs his helmet.

He smokes Silk Cut cigarettes, and so there is a timeless quality to him as he stands there in his classic riding costume, razor thin, handsome and elegant—the way all people in cigarette advertisements, going to the hounds, used to look

That’s Alf’s memory of him in those days, too.

Read the rest of this entry »