If you must take in a show at Westpac’s expense, surely you can do better than Bon Jovi

This should have been the focus of the Greens' song and dance about hospitality.

Alf is more than miffed with the wretched Greens today.

The buggers have been kicking up a fuss about the way Westpac has been treating some of our Ministers.

Westpac – like any bank – does not score highly for being generous and should be encouraged to be hospitable to all sorts of people.

Kicking up a hullabaloo about its treatment of politicians is apt to have them back out of being hospitable and to revert to being the mean-minded bunch of bastards with which most of us are familiar.

The grouchy Greens are likely to have prompted Westpac to revisit its hospitality policy.

A terrible toss-up between siding with tax-trimming bankers or with brain-taxing wankers

Alf has never been a champion of the banks and the bankers who run them. He has been especially sour about the buggers since they pulled out of Eketahuna.

But the sadsack socialists at The Standard are more loathesome than bankers.

Today a bloke called Eddie is banging on about the big bucks owed to the IRD.

The banks, who tried to rip us off to the tune of $2.6 billion, have agreed to pay us $2.2 billion.

I don’t get it. We’ve spent tens of millions so far on court cases to get our money. We’ve won every case.