A simple way of avoiding a messy divorce and marital property dispute – just marry yourself

How to avoid becoming a beaten wife.

Alf is perplexed by the prospect of the idea catching on, after reading of Chen Wei-yih’s wedding.

The Telegraph reports on how the woman posed for a set of photos in a flowing white dress, enlisted a wedding planner and rented a banquet hall for a marriage celebration with 30 friends.

Uninspired by the men she’s met but facing social pressure to get married, the 30-year-old office worker from Taipei will hold the reception next month.

“Age thirty is a prime period for me. My work and experience are in good shape, but I haven’t found a partner, so what can I do?” Chen said.

“It’s not that I’m anti-marriage. I just hope that I can express a different idea within the bounds of a tradition.”

Dunno that Alf gives a toss, but the Telegraph also says Taiwanese women are marrying later and less often as their economic status advances.

And the Taiwanese government is concerned about a drop in the birth rate and its impact on productivity.

Only two fifths of women surveyed earlier this year by the education ministry said they imagined married people could live better than singles, local media said.

Miss Chen says she hopes more people would love themselves.

She intends going on honeymoon to Australia.

She will find plenty of people there who are seriously in love with themselves.

And what does her mum think?

She said her mother had insisted on a groom at first but later jumped aboard the solo marriage plan.

But as Miss Chen cannot officially register a marriage to herself, if she finds a man later she will wed again.

It’s not a famous first, as it transpires.

Mrs Grumble tracked down the case of a Dutch woman who married herself.

Having met a few Dutch blokes over the years, Alf is not surprised by her choice.

The woman in this case was a Dutch artist who said she would marry herself to show people how much she loves the different sides of her character.

Jennifer Hoes, 29, has ordered a complete wedding party, wedding dress and marriage certificate.

She told Haarlem’s Dagblad newspaper: “I want to celebrate with others how much I’m in love with myself.”

She says she regards the wedding as a reward for her years of struggle between the emotional and business sides of her character.

Ms Hoes said: “Finally I managed to unite these conflicting parts of my character, and I find it most logical that it results in a wedding.”

An alderman of the city of Haarlem agreed to act as registrar, although the wedding could not be registered officially in the books.

Hence – like Miss Chen – Ms Hoes wasn’t ruling out a more conventional wedding at some stage in the future.

Having a Bob (or Roberta) each way, so to speak.

“But I will never divorce myself. I don¹t want to become emotionally dependent from another for not being in balance with myself. This marriage is really for better or for worse,” she added.

She must have gone ahead with her wedding, because Mrs Grumble found an interview with her a year or so later:

KARL ZIPSER: Is it not a bit self-centered to marry yourself?

JENNIFER HOES: I believe if a person is loyal to him- or herself, he or she he has more to offer to others — to be active, straight and involved in relationships. Therefor, by no means, is marrying yourself a self-centered act. In my wedding I needed my family and friends there as my witnesses and it was also a celebration of my relationships and intentions with them.

KARL ZIPSER: Marriage is of course more than a ceremony. There is also a wedding night . . .

JENNIFER HOES: The wedding night I spent alone and slept like a baby! I feel my wedding-night was the most logical one after a hectic day!

KARL ZIPSER: There is also a honey moon . . .

JENNIFER HOES: Unfortunately I had no money for a honeymoon, that would have been nice and welcome after the hard work.

Mrs Grumble delved further and found this marrying yourself stuff was thought of hundreds of years ago, and is mentioned in the Magna Carta.

(8) No widow shall be compelled to marry herself, while she is willing to live without a husband; but yet she shall give security that she will not marry herself without our consent, if she hold of us, or without the consent of the lord of whom she does hold, if she hold of another.

Mind you, Mrs Grumble hasn’t a clue what this means, and Alf admits he does not know, either.

He does know the idea of women marrying themselves is unlikely to catch on – not in a big way, at least – in this country.

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