How many attended United Future’s conference? Too many for a phone box (but not by much)

News of United Future holding a conference at the weekend had Alf musing on how much it would have cost to rent a phone box for the occasion.

He now concedes he was being ungenerous in harbouring that thought.

United Future needed a bit more space than that.

But not much more. At a squeeze, they could have held their conference in the Grumbles’ bathroom.

Radio NZ’s reporter would have had just enough fingers and toes to tally the numbers who gathered for the occasion, although maybe he or she preferred not to pull off their shoes and sox and so failed to produce a definite head count.

Instead we are told here that –

About 20 people gathered in Auckland on Saturday for the party’s annual meeting, where they endorsed a plan to re-brand the party.

Despite this clear demonstration that the party has scant appeal, the buggers have grand ideas.

Or party leader Peter Dunne does.

He has challenged his party members to mobilise voters to support the party at the next election.

It will be fascinating to see the results at the next election, because –

At the last election, United Future won 0.6% of the party vote, an outcome that president Robin Gunston describes as “pretty pitiful”.

So what can be done to something like this to make it more appealing?

Let’s try a new coat of paint.

Or even better, some new branding.

And so Gunston has put forward a plan to re-brand United Future as liberal democrats.

This – he says – will link the party to a world-wide political movement.

And if after all that they muster just 0.6% of the vote at the next election…what then?

The common-sense party will have gone down the dunny which is why holding the conference in the Grumbles’ bathroom is not such a bad idea.

They could just wrap things up now, flush ’em straight down the pan and spare themselves a lot of campaign time and effort.

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