Rooftop protest could make it harder for the public to see MPs (and Annette King to skip to the loo)

Gotta say Alf hopes the book is thrown at the Greenpeace tossers who staged the day-long protest yesterday over what they say is government inaction on climate change.

Even better, let’s throw a library of books at them because this should inflict greater hurt.

The tiresome foursome are believed to have used scaffolding at the rear of Parliament to get onto the building, then make their way to the ledge which overlooks the forecourt.

Alf didn’t pay much attention to their antics, but it seems they placed solar panels there and unfurled a benner with a photo of the Prime Minister, John Key, and the words “cut pollution, create jobs – yeah, nah”.

Not all MPs were too dismayed but according to Radio NZ:

Grant Robertson goes future-gazing for dairy farmers (and is gloomy) while Our Bill fluffs his percentages

Look out for this during arguments about dairying..

It’s not too often Alf has to worry about his mate Bill English.

But he did wriggle somewhat uncomfortably today when it sounded suspiciously as if Bill was getting into the soothsaying business.

Labour’s Grant Robertson most certainly was doing it.

But Alf is not surprised to hear that lefties have been desperately poking sticks into chicken entrails or some such to try to read the future, then have emerged to proclaim that the future is looking grimmer than the Government is willing to acknowledge.

Hark, the Herald’s angle sings – mostly because it emphasises McCully’s thoughts on Saudi sheep deal

The NZ Herald perhaps has summed up the deal correctly with its headline. Or Stuff has done so.

But they can’t both be right – can they?

The Herald has gone for…

Saudi farm spend ‘an opportunity’

At Stuff you will be told...

Government’s $6 million investment into a Saudi farm ‘dodgy’

The differing attitudes depend on whose observations were given emphasis early in the story.

The angle taken by the reporter, in other words (or by the rewrite staff if it was rewritten).

Let’s start at Stuff.

Yes, other blue seats could be at risk because of economic neglect – eg Tolley’s East Coast patch

One of Alf’s mates, who has been reading some analysis by NZ Herald political hack John Armstrong, was unduly concerned about his political pal’s future.

He has been assured that Alf is safe and secure in his National stronghold.

The concern was raised by Armstrong’s observation that Winston Peters had cut a swathe through the wealthier parts of the Northland electorate in Saturday’s byelection.

This secured him the most votes in the National bastion of Kerikeri and matched the number cast for the ruling party in Wellsford.

That’s what we want from the PM – a clear warning that a vote for Peters is a vote against wider bridges

You’ve got to wonder why we bother hiring these high-flying press advisers, campaign strategists and what-have you.

The Boss has done the right thing on the Northland by-election campaign trail thanks to advice – freely given – by the Member for Eketahuna North.

The advice was to tell it like it is.

Our promises to build bloody bridges in a far-flung part of the country and give the locals broadband are blatant bribes.

Vote for some other plonker and we don’t pay up.

Because Alf is a firm believer in the vote-winning possibilities of bribes – or pork barrelling, if you are squeamish – he was delighted to hear the bridge-building plan announced when it looked like Winston Peters was in with a chance.

But he was dismayed when he heard:

Don’t sniff too closely at our bridge upgrade plans – think instead of the scents of going for broke

Roll out the barrel..

That was Alf’s advice when party chiefs consulted him at the weekend on how to counter the Peters threat.

No, he was not talking about rolling out the beer barrel to liquor up the locals. That would be bribery and bribery is seriously frowned upon in our electoral laws.

Alf was recommending we roll out the pork barrel.

Pork barreling, of course, is a term used to describe the appropriation of government spending for localised projects secured solely or primarily to bring money to a representative’s district.

Alf has recommended this tactic before, and the party bosses have listened.

Those bleats from Turei should trigger a big hurray – the spy-monitoring committee will be Green-free

 

Sorry – this is the wrong colour for our intelligence committee.

It looks like discord has broken out between Labour and the Greens. Hurrah.

The greenies are in a tizz because none of them will be sitting on Parliament’s intelligence and security committee. Hurrah again. The public can sleep more safely in their beds knowing their security is in safe hands.

It’s all the result of Labour leader Andrew Little shutting the minor parties  out of a place at the table where the closed-door committee will oversee a major review of the security services this year.

The Greens – boohoo – say Little has broken the law, because he didn’t consult with any other party leaders before selecting his foreign affairs spokesman David Shearer.

Willie agrees Maori are entitled to a half-share of political power, but he’ll settle for less for now

Willie Jackson has popped up in New Plymouth to confirm Alf’s suspicions that some indigenous persons in this country feel the Treaty of Waitangi entitles them to a half share of anything that’s up for grabs, especially a slice of the political action.

He can count on bumping into some craven Pakeha person who is only too willing to give away the half share of the action that Jackson is claiming.

New Plymouth mayor Andrew Judd comes into this category. He reckons Maori should be given half the seats on his council – and on every other council in the land. Never minds what the citizens think.

Jackson obviously concurs that this is a fair go.

According to this report in the Daily News:

Institutional racism is bad if it puts you behind bars but it’s good if it gets you into Parliament

The Maori Party is happy to go along with some forms of institutional racism.

“I keep this handy to deal with Winston Peters.”

Indeed, it encourages them and will excoriate critics who suggest they be got rid of.

It all depends on the nature of the outcome and who are the beneficiaries.

Winston Peters spotted a few of the Maori Party’s favoured forms of racism early this year (and for his troubles was denounced by the Maori Party, the greenies and the lefties).

Mr Peters, speaking at Ratana Pa, says his party would never support “separatist” Maori Party policies such as having separate Maori units in prison, the separate Maori social welfare system Whanau Ora and the Tino Rangatiratanga Flag.

Mr Peters says he could not work with the Maori Party as long as it keeps “separatist” policies.

“You can’t have a Crown that’s composed of two different groups – the rest and Maori. Either we’re all together or we’re all going to be separate,” he says.

Great idea … the closer you live to the ticket booth, the cheaper should be your entry fee

A cheaper deal is on offer for locals.

The Waitangi National Trust has concocted a fee-charging formula that should be applied more widely around the country.

Under this formula, people who live close to the Waitangi Treaty Ground are treated more favourably than people who live further away.

The scheme was disclosed in a news item from Radio NZ after the trust decided to make people pay to get into the treaty grounds.

As of Saturday, as Alf understands it, New Zealanders will pay $15 to visit the treaty grounds with children up to 18 free if accompanied by parents or caregivers.

The charge for overseas visitors will remain at $25 with children free.

The Waitangi National Trust is telling us that charging Kiwis is necessary because the drop in tourism caused by the global financial crisis means there are no longer enough fee-paying overseas visitors to subsidise free entry for locals.

This has raised the dander of Kelvin Davis and taken his mind – for now – off his party’s leadership circus (which itself would command an entry fee and pull in crowds of those who enjoy a great farce).